Christmas Eve Special Edition of Little Miss Notoriety’s Advice Column #ASMSG #Holidays #Advice #Christmas

  • Happy Holidays you lovely creatures. I hope you’re having a most scrumptious Christmas Eve. Thank you for joining me for this special edition of my advice column.  Tonight is all about how to survive your family during the Holiday Season… Ready? Get set? Go…

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  • This advice can be used for so many thing during the holiday season… Let’s start with- if your mother asks you to look at the corn on her little toe. Run… fast and hard.  When your mother’s brother’s uncle tries to pry into your love life, because he’s a miserable drunk that can’t get laid. Run… and HIDE. He knows where you live.  When the 2 almost 3-year-old has pooped in his pants, because his parents won’t potty train him, but they didn’t want to hear the lecture of  “why is your kid still in diapers?” Run… before they ask you to help!  And last but certainly not least… When your lovely grandfather pulls out his false teeth and says. “Oh hunny bring me that glass.” Pretend you didn’t hear, and RUN!   I wish I had been given this advice.

Advice Insane

  • First you have twitter and in 140 characters or less you can have a rant over why you hate your family.  Then you have blogs like this, where you can express all that hatred through poetry, prose, or photos.  And last but not least… you got PORN! The internet is for Porn… The Internet is for Porn – Sesame Street Style! – YouTube

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  • Right… well I’m not posting what I got myself, but I did purchase myself some fabulously naughty gifts and so did Joseph. I can’t wait to get back home to that pole!
  • So… that statement is true for giving as well as getting. Take my advice- Don’t be a spoiled rotten brat. If your 80-year-old granny gives you a pair of socks with cats on them, you put them bitches on and wear them like they are stylish! Don’t you hurt that woman’s feelings, or I will come and snatch you up and beat the tar out of you. And not in a fun spanky kinda way. Ask Bruce the Butcher what happens when you cross Little Miss Notoriety!
  • Mingle with your co-workers, it’s the only way to find out the dirt.  That is, if you’d like your pick of whom to fuck in town like me.
  • You get nothing, when you ask for nothing.  Remember this for future reference.  Nothing is just going to be handed over… Well unless you’re me, and then life just seems to keep overflowing with loveliness. Fuckdoll by day, and Dominatrix by night, I have the perfect life.

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  • I  disagree.  Mistletoe should be hung with care, no matter where. Hah, I rhymed, Penny would be so proud.  And believe me… Mistletoe hung there, gets the best kisses ever! 

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  • And last but certainly not least… This is true for Santa, but certainly do not ask Mrs. Claus this question! She’s a prude and is liable to deny you presents for life. She has Santa by a ball, and I heard Bad Penny has the other one.  
  • In conclusion… Exercise a month prior to the holidays, and you should buy new running shoes.  When all else fails, the Internet is for Porn! Don’t be an ungrateful bitch/bastard, and have kinky office sex.  Christmas is your traditions and yours to make it what you want. Don’t let someone tell you where to hang your Mistletoe!

Sharing my Christmas Presents with you…

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This is likely my favored Christmas present. They are lace thigh-highs with connecting bows. “He who shall not be named”  got these for me, and I feel super sexy-hot-byotchy while wearing them.  😉  I feel like that most days, but these personify it. -giggles-

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I shared these prior, but I do adore them, so I decided to share again. Also a gift from “he who shall not be named”. 🙂

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Super sexy baby pink above the knee hosiery/socks.  They look amazing with my ruffling pink panties below, both from @SassyTwatter … She’s a great person inside and out, and I’m grateful for having her in my life.

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I also received these….  Rainbow above the Knee Socks, also from “he who shall not be named”

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Then there were the prison stripey socks! I was hoping they would mean rough, raunchy sex including bondage and spanking was in my future, but I think I got them because they were on my list. LOL

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I have to say I’m adorable in this skirt! And yes that’s a bow! 🙂

This really has been one of the best Christmas’ on record, and it really isn’t because of the gifts I’ve received.  I’ve had the opportunity to meet so many amazing people on my path of writing, and these are just a few examples of the amazing-ness that fills my life on a daily basis.  It’s seriously good to be the Bad Penny, and I’m thrilled to always be to blame.  🙂

P.S. Last but not least, this bad boy…

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Yes… I asked for one of these, but it weighs 5lbs. Seriously… NOT a starter plug. 🙂 It makes a great paper weight. Lovers you SassyTwatter!

Sharing a little of my Christmas with you! #ASMSG

  • Hello my lovelies… I hope you’re all having an amazing Christmas Eve. A promised, here’s a little glimpse into my world this year at Christmas time…

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  • So … my tree represents so many different facets of me, from my love of pink, to the oddities, and shoes.  I have a little of everything when it comes to decorations… 

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  • A frog because she’s cute and her legs wiggle. 🙂
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  • Absolutely… And any man who disagrees will be single for the rest of his life. (Helpful Tip # 789)

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  • Hah.  This is my newest ornament, and I am the glitter princess.  And p.s. my glitter has secret ninja powers. -winks-

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  • A sock-monkey, because it’s a fucking sock-monkey and it’s awesome! It’s also pink, and it makes my bestie completely traumatized. 🙂 Evil begets evil… remember. -winks- 

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  • I love new shoes, socks, and clothes, but the truth is I’m not really materialistic. Love, guidance, and a firm hand is really what I need.  😉 And then he can buy me shoes, socks, and  clothing. -giggles madly-

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  • A little glimpse into my Christmas Compound of kinkery. (above and below) A small but mighty village. -grins- 
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Ch. 7 The Chat Box Dominant: Diary of a Broken Me #ASMSG

 Diary of a Broken Me

I’m Breathing Your Air, Sir.

To whom it may concern,

It’s 4:15am and I just crawled into my bed. Which is exactly how you described it. You and Cynthia sleep in the king sized bed, and I have a special bed at the foot, just my size, and perfect for a princess. I’m too excited to sleep. I’m breathing your air, I’m sharing your space, and I’m watching you breathe.

I’m dead tired though, if that makes any sense.

The 16 hour flight here was something to write home about, but instead I’ll write you. You love my jokes, admit it, Sir? I’m so thankful you told me to take medicine for my tummy before I got on the plane, and continue taking it as prescribed. Three people got sick, and I can’t tell you how blessed I feel they were nowhere near me.

I arrived forty-five minutes late, but you were there waiting on me. You looked just like on Skype, only better. I know people thought what the hell’s this broad doing when I fell to my knees at your feet in the middle of the airport. You told me to go with my gut reaction, Sir. And you didn’t seem too upset with the display, in fact I believe you said it humbled you just a little to know I had that much devotion to you.

I love you, Sir. For the first time in so very, very long I feel whole, I feel complete. I feel a hole has been filled up inside of me that was void of life for so long. You two fill my life fully, and I am devoted to you both for as long as you will have me. No, that wasn’t a declaration of I’m not returning home, even though you did bring it up at dinner. I can’t make that step yet, Sir. I hope you understand.

You are the bestest (yes, bestest!) Christmas present a princess could ever ask for, Sir. However here are lots of boxes under your tree with my name. I don’t have lots of boxes for you or Cynthia, I have a few things, but I couldn’t travel with them all. I do hope one of you will take me shopping? I’ll feel horrible, if I don’t get a few more things. I’m not trying to compete, I can’t. You make the big bucks, Daddy, but I want to at least get you THE present, both of you for that matter. I’ve no idea what to get the children either. I’m sure Cynthia and I can hash that out.

I love her hair by the way Sir. I know it’s odd to tell you this here, but she has the most gorgeous copper penny color. And it’s super silky, and feels like the softest cotton running through my fingers. And we’re similar in skin coloring, she’s a purist of white shade, and turns a delicious shade of pink, just like me.

I watched tonight, opting not to participate, but to help entertain, and masturbate for you both, while you played and fucked. My pale blue eyes never left the lusty scene you two provided, my fingers slipped through my slipper slit over and over, and plunged deep into the walls of my sex as you fucked Cynthia senseless.

It was one of the most beautiful acts of love I’d ever witness, and we all came in unison. You pulled me in closer, so we could all collapse into a pile of sweaty bodies. I never felt more loved than I did at that moment, Sir. Odd to feel that way, knowing I wasn’t the center of your world. You know what it is, being the center isn’t needed, but being in your life is more than necessary. I’m grateful for the glimpses and pieces you’re willing to share with me.

I’m going to try to sleep now, we have a few busy days before Christmas.

Signed,

The girl who sorta wishes she’d been fucked also ( lol )