Christmas Eve Special Edition of Little Miss Notoriety’s Advice Column #ASMSG #Holidays #Advice #Christmas

  • Happy Holidays you lovely creatures. I hope you’re having a most scrumptious Christmas Eve. Thank you for joining me for this special edition of my advice column.  Tonight is all about how to survive your family during the Holiday Season… Ready? Get set? Go…

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  • This advice can be used for so many thing during the holiday season… Let’s start with- if your mother asks you to look at the corn on her little toe. Run… fast and hard.  When your mother’s brother’s uncle tries to pry into your love life, because he’s a miserable drunk that can’t get laid. Run… and HIDE. He knows where you live.  When the 2 almost 3-year-old has pooped in his pants, because his parents won’t potty train him, but they didn’t want to hear the lecture of  “why is your kid still in diapers?” Run… before they ask you to help!  And last but certainly not least… When your lovely grandfather pulls out his false teeth and says. “Oh hunny bring me that glass.” Pretend you didn’t hear, and RUN!   I wish I had been given this advice.

Advice Insane

  • First you have twitter and in 140 characters or less you can have a rant over why you hate your family.  Then you have blogs like this, where you can express all that hatred through poetry, prose, or photos.  And last but not least… you got PORN! The internet is for Porn… The Internet is for Porn – Sesame Street Style! – YouTube

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  • Right… well I’m not posting what I got myself, but I did purchase myself some fabulously naughty gifts and so did Joseph. I can’t wait to get back home to that pole!
  • So… that statement is true for giving as well as getting. Take my advice- Don’t be a spoiled rotten brat. If your 80-year-old granny gives you a pair of socks with cats on them, you put them bitches on and wear them like they are stylish! Don’t you hurt that woman’s feelings, or I will come and snatch you up and beat the tar out of you. And not in a fun spanky kinda way. Ask Bruce the Butcher what happens when you cross Little Miss Notoriety!
  • Mingle with your co-workers, it’s the only way to find out the dirt.  That is, if you’d like your pick of whom to fuck in town like me.
  • You get nothing, when you ask for nothing.  Remember this for future reference.  Nothing is just going to be handed over… Well unless you’re me, and then life just seems to keep overflowing with loveliness. Fuckdoll by day, and Dominatrix by night, I have the perfect life.

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  • I  disagree.  Mistletoe should be hung with care, no matter where. Hah, I rhymed, Penny would be so proud.  And believe me… Mistletoe hung there, gets the best kisses ever! 

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  • And last but certainly not least… This is true for Santa, but certainly do not ask Mrs. Claus this question! She’s a prude and is liable to deny you presents for life. She has Santa by a ball, and I heard Bad Penny has the other one.  
  • In conclusion… Exercise a month prior to the holidays, and you should buy new running shoes.  When all else fails, the Internet is for Porn! Don’t be an ungrateful bitch/bastard, and have kinky office sex.  Christmas is your traditions and yours to make it what you want. Don’t let someone tell you where to hang your Mistletoe!

Adventures of Little Miss Notoriety #Erotica Anthology #ASMSG

Good morning my lovelies…

I’ve neglected you so much lately, but my life has been all over the place. In case you aren’t in the know… I’m moving to Tulsa, Ok for work, and because I need a new adventure in my life.

There are many reasons that led up to my move, which is already in progress. In fact, I’ve been sleeping on an air mattress for two weeks. Yikes, but I’m surviving, and wanted to share some awesomesauce news with you guys!

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I have new book trailers for all my books! My good friend and fellow bdsm erotic romance author Maggie Carpenter made my 1st one, and I’m very grateful to her.  She’s one of my favorite authors, so make sure to check out her books!

Oh… I guess you wanna see the book trailer, right?

Amazeballs… I want to read the book, and I wrote it! but if you aren’t convinced yet…

I thought a little sneak peek at a chapter might help… 

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Ch. 5

BELLE NOTORIETY GETS THE BELT

“Belle…I said have those papers on my desk when I walked in the office, so would you care to explain why I don’t have them?” Joseph’s tall muscular frame shadowed over Miss Notoriety as her heart became a war drum pounding in her ears.

Mondays were always a fist full of excitement around the law office of Mr. Switzer, and that Monday was no different

“I… Umm…I apologize, Sir.” Belle stammered over her words, his face now inches from hers, and her deep blue eyes stared into the dark abyss of chocolate-brown. “My sister called, and I lost track of time. I’ll have them on your desk in less than fifteen minutes, Sir.”

“Not good enough.” Her head thrashed back with the hard yank of her hair. “Your sister is more important than your job, Miss Notoriety? Or more important than me?” He growled across her lips, and Belle could barely catch her breath before his lips crashed into hers, and she was devoured by the wolf.

He demanded her attention be given to his mouth and tongue, and Joseph’s free hand kneaded and pinched at her already hardening nipples. Each breast treated in the same rough fashion, and the kiss ended with a rush of air filling their lungs.

“Please Joseph, I’m sorry. Nothing’s more important than you.” Belle melted to the floor finding her knees, her chin tipped down, and her cheek brushed his outer thigh. She was apologizing, or tried to, before she was not so gently coaxed off the floor, and bent over her desk in the middle of the office.

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Adventures of Little Miss Notoriety 

Please go get your copy here:

US

UK

CA

Penelope Jones- Spanking it since 1996!

Copyright 2013

NEW Release! Come along for the Adventures of Little Miss Notoriety #ASMSG #Erotica #BDSM

Good morning my lovelies… 

 

I figured you were sick of my tagline- “It’s here, it’s here!”  But IT’S HERE!

 

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Belle Notoriety might be Joe Switzer’s fuck doll, but the rest of Shagville Heights bows to her.  Watch out… she’ll get into your head, and you won’t be able to resist confessing your dirty little secrets. Come along for the Adventures of Little Miss Notoriety. and see just who becomes whose sex toy!

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Adventures of Little Miss Notoriety Buy Links:

US  http://bit.ly/A-LMN

UK  http://bit.ly/LMN-UK

CA  http://bit.ly/LMN-CA

 

A HUGE thank you to PJ Perryman; Little Miss Notoriety started with a superb idea from her and has taken off to become what it is now! You’re the best!!!

 

Penelope Jones- Spanking it since 1996! 

copyright 2013

 

Adventures of Little Miss Notoriety Cover Reveal!!! #ASMSG #Erotica #Dominatrix #BDSM

Lick. Suck. Blow.

His name was Joe

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My funds had depleted so low,

and he had mad dough

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You perverts…

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Lick his envelopes

Suck his carpets clean with a vacuum

and blow leaves off the walkway

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Lick. Suck. Blow

No, I’m not a ho

I’m Joe Switzer’s  secretary though

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But later…

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I’ll lick him clean

suck him dry,

and blow his mind

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Because I’m that kinda girl… Lick. Suck. Blow.

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Variety….

I’m Little Miss Bell Notoriety

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Coming to an ebook vendor near you!!!

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Adventures of Little Miss Notoriety will be available August 1st…. I truly hope you love her as much as I do…and here’s a special shout out to my girl @PattiSparkles who helped me created Miss Bell Notoriety! I lovers you long time girl!!! 

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Penelope Jones- Spanking it since 1996!

Copyright 2013